The Secret History From Afar

Afar City - Archaeologists have unearthed ancient tablets buried deep in the outskirts of the city. The tablets, which did not correspond to any known civilization, was purported to be at least 9000 years old. The tablets were found in mid-2006, but information was declared classified until now.

"The tablets pinpoint to a migrant culture from the Atlantic, which uses writing similar to the Classic Afar Script. Translation of inscriptions on the tablets indicate that their homeland was called Lo-Li-Kon." stated Professor Icy at an interview in the Afar City University.

The professor elaborated, "Lo-Li-Kon society was way ahead of its time, growing genetically modified crops and motorized machinery at a time when agriculture was new to the world and most humans were huddling naked around fires."

"Evidence suggests that the Lo-Li-Kon culture may be the precursor to our Afar nation." he adds.

Information extraction conducted on the tablets revealed that the island of Lo-Li-Kon was home to 3 cities - one in the north and two in the south - corresponding to a symbol on the tablets, which strike an uncanny resemblance to the national flag of Lands From Afar (see pic below).

The national flag was been recorded in history as having been first flown by the founding queen of Afar in 200 AD after unifying the nation. Modern day historians, however, argue that variations of the national flag had been used by rival tribes prior to the unification.

A book on the Lo-Li-Kon civilization will be published by the University of Afar in conjunction with the Ministry of Tourism next year.


National flag of Lands From Afar

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Blogging Part 3

Blogging tips for beginners, continued from Blogging Part 2.

Be friendly to thy neighbor
Join communities and interact with other bloggers/enthusiasts of your niche. Being part of one or more groups of people with similar interests will reward you with visits to your blog (and comments on your posts), insights on things you probably had no knowledge about before, and an all new network of friends brought together through your interests.


Ways you can do this:
1. Participate in a forum related to your niche, or start a section/thread in a generic forum about your niche

2. Visit and comment on blogs/sites related to your niche or even just ones you’re interested in

3. Start a group for your niche on a social networking site (e.g. Facebook)

4. Be active on microblogging services (Twitter, Plurk)

5. Take part in events related to your niche/help organize it even (e.g. blog carnivals, outings)

6. If possible: extend these efforts offline

You are your own PR agent
Apart networking with fellow enthusiasts (of your genre) and random online friends, there are other ways of marketing your blog, similar to the ways a conventional business does advertising*

1. Tell it to the market – put your good posts up on social bookmarking sites, mention your posts if they contain an answer to a question on online communities (take care not to over-advertise though), link your posts on Twitter/Facebook

2. Joint venture marketing – recommend and mention interesting posts of your peers from time to time, a helping hand tends to be reciprocated

3. Use short, concise titles related to your topic (if you’re writing about chocolate cookies you at yesterday, try “Fleet Street Chocolate Cookies” rather than “Baked pieces from heaven at Fleet Street shop”. This will help search engines lead people to your post.

4. Write good quality, informative posts – quality work brings reputation in itself. Search engines like long high quality posts on blogs which have been around for some time

5. Use keywords: maximize them. If you’re writing about Fleet Street Chocolate Cookies, use the words “chocolate”, “cookies”, “cocoa”, “Fleet Street” as often as you can where appropriate. Try not to make your post unreadable though. This will help with SEO (search engine optimization) – maximizing your chances of being listed by search engine results.

6. Including internal links to your older posts in your writing also helps readers know your blog better.

7. Loyalty programs – put in RSS or email subscription capabilities on your blog for repeat readers. Acknowledge those that you know of in a post

8. Organize contests and other events on your blog


Dangers of blogging (BONUS TIPS)
*I compared blogging to a business earlier on. This can be misleading. While a lot of things are managed the way a business is (like our personal lives), blogging is ultimately a hobby and should not be viewed as a get-rich-quick scheme. Because it is not.

Making money on the internet is fundamentally the same as in conventional life:

A) You offer a product or service which people want. (e.g. e-bay shops, online businesses, blogs telling people the secret of making it rich online (similar to all of the get-rich-books on sale in bookstores)).

B) You get very famous, and make money off of payments from reviewing people’s products and ad money. First word of caution: Famous bloggers DO NOT make close to a fraction of the money earned by conventional sports/film/music celebrities. Second word of caution: There are many more aspiring actors/actresses in Hollywood than actual stars. Same thing in the blogosphere.

Other things to be wary of in the world of blogging:

1. SEO (Search Engine Optimization)** “experts” – there are snake oil salesmen around even on the internet. Vet self proclaimed SEO experts thoroughly before handing your money over. Ask yourself - do I need an SEO consultant? Who are the successful clients of this consultant? There are many cons over the internet, which I learned being a regular and later a moderator at a popular bloggers forum. **SEO stands for search engine optimization, which is basically methods on make your blog more visible on search engines.

2. Haters will hate – Most unsuspecting (new) users of internet tend to think of the internet same as offline life (generally civil to strangers). Shock will follow. Due to the anonymity provided by the internet, users are free to unleash their innermost thoughts with little risk of repercussion. Unkind personal remarks and unrelenting personal attacks are all risks associated with having an online persona in the blogosphere. Spam too.

3. Big Brother is watching…..even online – Being alone and undetected on the internet is a myth. Your ISP (Internet Service Provider) and government is watching you. Be aware. Examples of things that will bring the police to your door: posting child porn on a major blogging platform, overtly criticizing the government in a police state in front of a large online audience.

Next up is the finale in this series: observing your audience

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Urban Exploration

Urban exploration, or everyday city tourism, is an oft underpublicized hobby in Malaysia – in contrast to the blogosphere famous haikyo (廃虚) trips of Japan. Where haikyo involves only the exploration of abandoned (modern) ruins; urban exploration involves both the visitation of modern ruins, and the still occupied, still living places in the city.

So, haikyo a.k.a. visiting abandoned buildings – where’s the fun in that? And wait…..isn’t this trespassing? Dangerous?


Most haikyo enthusiasts are also avid photographers, and take pleasure in photographing places in states of decay, manmade structures now being reclaimed by nature. There is also a touch of history about these places (an abandoned home of a folk musician tells of his past glories; and quintessential aspects of his everyday life and loved ones). All this adds up to mono no aware (物の哀れ), a sense of the impermanent nature of things and a bittersweet feeling at their passing – something uniquely Japanese (which is partly why this hobby is bigger in Japan than it is elsewhere).

Legality is a tricky issue and would presumably depend on the local municipal laws (anyone cares to shed light on this?). Ethically, however, going into an open building abandoned for years (most veteran enthusiasts forbid breaking locks/windows to get in) and taking nothing but pictures is hardly an issue.

Danger, of course, does lurk around – these buildings were abandoned for a reason (rusty stairways, unsafe infrastructure etc.) and potentially dangerous characters may inhabit.

Urban exploration adds a touch of the living to haikyo by including the visit of living places. Old mansions still inhabited in the neighborhood, a temple around the corner, a hotel with a nice open–air view/pool all make nice visits.

I have been a lunchtime urban explorer for some years now – from college to work. Not having a particular need to be accompanied all the time during my meals, I sometimes have a quick lunch alone and then spend the rest of my lunch hour+ exploring places around. In the process, I’ve found a restaurant serving vegetarian at pretty economical prices inside a nearby temple, interesting small mansions in the heart of Kuala Lumpur and Indian-style chicken rice for one (not Tandoori).

Neighborhoods also make great places to visit. City people are divided into different “tribes” if you will, some by social class, some by cultural heritage, and others by choice – all living very different lifestyles. Many, absorbed in their own lives, seldom really pay attention to the other “tribes”. Malaysia, being a historical melting pot of culture, is a good example of this.
Unfortunately, I have not participated in the haikyo part of urban exploration, though. Perhaps one fine day…..

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Buta Kimuchi

Ah, fall in Japan, the season for sakura viewing parties. Goes well with tea. And something hot. Instead of all the traditional dishes, one might try a fusion dish this year. Say, a Korean-Japanese dish of hot meat with spicy vegetables.

This would be the buta kimuchi (豚キムチ), literally "kimchee pork", which is available at some restaurants around central Kuala Lumpur.



Kimuchi, you say? Not to be mistaken for kimochi (気持ちいい), which means "good feelings"; kimuchi (キムチ) is the Japanese version of Korean kimchee (김치). The main difference between the two is that kimuchi is not fermented like kimchee is. One would think that having similar cuisine would unite cultures but this, unfortunately, led to a huge row between Japan and Korea in 1996.

One also might be tempted to confuse pork bulgogi (a famous Korean dish) and buta kimuchi, but again, these are two very different dishes, with the exception of pork being the main ingredient. Bulgogi is grilled, while buta kimuchi is stir-fried. Bulgogi contains no kimchee/kimuchi, while buta kimuchi does.

Learn how to make your own buta kimuchi here.

Learn how to make your own pork bulgogi here.

Note: This is a November Japan Blog Matsuri submission.

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Cats in November

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Hiking

In the hectic day-to-day pace of modern urban life, we often find ourselves not getting enough physical activity. Most young workers head to gyms around the city which can be expensive, crowded and full of sweat-filled air. The more popular machines are the treadmill and various weightlifting paraphernalia.

For those seeking to stay fit or “keep fit” only, there is a cheaper natural alternative with better smelling air.


Hiking is rarely associated with cities. However, a quick search on the Internet tends to turn up unexpected spots close by. Kuala Lumpur, located in a valley, has a wealth of hilly hiking spots, which contrast with its many skyscrapers.

---------------------Those not in KL please scroll down past this--------------------
I usually spend part of a weekend morning on Bukit Batu Puteh (popularly known as Bukit Apek, or Ah Pak San), a hill with trails and thoughtful rest stops put up by the local community. Its tree lined dirt paths provide shade against Malaysia’s infamous hot weather. This hill has a small waterfall near its peak and is located in Cheras, a southern district of Kuala Lumpur. Warning: Trails can get slippery after rains, please use the ropes provided in the steeper parts.

For those who like majestic views, Bukit Tabur to the north offers a skyline view of KLCC and the Petronas twin towers; as well as the Avatar-like misty Klang Gates Dam reservoir. Bukit Tabur is the longest quartz ridge in the world (source: WWF). A quartz ridge (or a quartz dyke) is the result of a geological fault being infilled by quartz crystals following the faults formation. Faults are cracks in the ground or hills formed by the stretching of the brittle earth (some of these events are accompanied by earthquakes). Warning: the quartz rocks are sharp and people have been hurt in accidents.
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Other major cities, however, require a day trip to the nearest hiking spot (like flat, flat London for example). Again, Google does wonders locating these spots.

So, how do I start?
1. Go to a search engine of your choice, type in “Hiking near [insert city]”. Read up on the applicable results. Re-search with the hiking place names if necessary.

2. After locating a suitable place, enter it into Google maps and print out the map to the place.

3. Pack a water bottle, towel, mini first aid kit and some snacks into a backpack. Get out your sports shoes (with some grip) and maybe a compass. Note: those who wish to go to challenging routes or longer than one day hikes should consider investing in hiking boots and a hydration pack (this is a water pack with a water tube). I purchased mine over e-Bay, but some backpacks come with hydration packs attached.

4. Get up early on the day. For safety reasons, it is recommended to hike only when the sun is up; and preferably with other people present on the trail.

5. Company? I hike alone, but bringing other people can be fun (different fitness levels can cause friction though). Both options have its own rewards. If you’re hiking alone though, make sure someone knows where you are, or chose a popular path.

6. Food? I normally breakfast on biscuits halfway through, but I have seen people taking up Bunsen burners with pots and cans of soup, or teapots. Whatever you can carry up, I suppose.

7. Go at your own pace. There is no need to go all the way to the peak on the first trip.

8. Make it a habit, if possible hike every weekend.




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Epic Comments Part 2

TsubasaNoTenshi: Does it come with a loli inside?

muteKi: No, silly. Pedobear comes inside a loli.
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What is the worse thing you have ever done?

HKE:(Skip to next comment)let see the worse thing , i dont know wich one is worse one than most of them let see , when i was a child an kid start bother me so much so i just throw him a pencil to end hit him near of him eye , the sharp part of the pencil , in middle school the language teacher ask me to conjugate a verb so i conjugate the verb "to shit" "shitting" to the rest in my language , i get 3 days of vacation after that , also when the teacher was goigng to check the notes i just grab some of the weak guys notebook erase their name and put mine there because i never make homework at that time , let say that i was in the grouo of the abusive guys who make other make your homework actually because of that someof the weak ones is a otaku so him notebook was filled with neon genesis eva , but one of the teacher was pretty clever and think that that wasnt my notebook so (the language teacher) tell me to make a kind of explanation about the series for the next day si the guy have to lend me him anime to not faild the damn assignature , so after that i get hooked with this kind of culture i even went one time at a convetion , i like it , at high school as always i end it the worse class of the school i start smoking (only marlboro menthol ones i dont like the others) i quit it not so much ago , my class burn an old bus of the '80 that the school keep dunno why , onoe of my friends got caugh smoking weed , my classmate make alot thinks they even fill a bottle with piss and throw it to some dudes ,we almost get all expelled , one day i get arrested because i was out of a house waiting a friend near of him house an because my face is scary sometime(not ugly , some girls love it specially my beard, yeah!)some call the police because i think they say i was to kill some or to rob a house , personally i have make alot more illegal things but i think i should also said it , with i said is already pretty bad

Pete Barton:Here's an audio version:

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omomo said:
Masturbating took a bleak turn after I ripped my penis off...

Palmtop Tiger said:
I-I-I'll lend you m-mine.

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